Insecurities

 
Before starting college, I never really understood why people badly wanted to be in a relationship.
Neither did I realise 3 months into college.

Yes, I admit, I've had my series of crushes. 2 infact. None of them productive or successful. However, now that i've entered my 5th month of college, I can understand why some people get depressed due to single-hood.

Its a peer thingy. Expecially when you see so many couples around you every single day, looking all happy and mushy. Its kinda cute I admit. But I also came to realise how it unconsciously makes someone who is single feel a little left out? I dont think thats the right word. hmmm...perhaps...lonely?...erm wishful? whatever it may be, I bet you understand (I HOPE).



I guess Its not the issue of being rejected wish sort of crumbles my outer appearance but the fact that I'm not good enough. Its mainly the insecurities and not the jealousy. If I see my crush with another girl, I'm not literally dying of jealousy but the frustration of not being able to look good enough or have the sparkling personality of that girl he is with is what takes over. Of course i'm not jealous of her. pfftt..heck no. Just the wish that I wasnt such a freak who scares away people. The wish that I was Taller, Hotter and everything else.
 

Yeah well thats peer pressure I guess. Sooner or later, you learn to adjust to it. I sincerely hope.....

So till then, I love being single !

Love The Way You Lie

Eminem. The one man whom i respect and love. I dont have to go ranting on how much i love him for words could not express the depth of my love for him.

As Eminem is back with his new album, "Recovery", the whole world is getting hooked on the song Love the way You lie featuring Rihanna. I would say this is one of the rare songs whereby Rihanna doesnt whine in her singing & she sounds real good. Me, being me took up the challenge of rapping and singing Love The Way You lie. I took about 2 hours to master the rap craft and was vain enough to record it.

 

                                                  

I honestly dont know why I adore him soo much. But I can assure you that if Eminem comes down to Malaysia, I would fight may way to get the mosh pit tickets. And i'd do watever it takes to meet him. He inspires me more than anyone else. So with that, Lets all drink a glass of champagne to Eminem's continuous success. ~Cheers~

Convent, a part of destiny..

i'm sure everyone has experienced moments like these...
with just a group of friends doing crazy stuff, candid pics, and joking around.

I personally feel soo blessed for having such great friends whom i can depend on and trust. So I thank fate, destiny and everything else which brought us together. It might have just been written in the stars that we were meant to be.

(to all you male peeps, i noe u guys arent in da vid. sry its cuz da whole vid is themed arnd CONVENT but do rmmb dat we treasure u soo much too boys)

so with that, heres a video put together by maha with all the love and inspiration she could find. Trust me it wasn't a piece of cake. So all credits go to her.



love all you people. My 5 years in convent wld probably be the best and most memorable times of my life.

~Once a conventanian, always a conventanian~


♥SPEARS ♥

HIM whom I lost

When I look at him, do you know what I see?

I see a lot of "IF's"

I see myself being happy

I see a possible future

I see passion and fire

I see myself laughing and crying at the same time

I see stubbornness and cockyness

I see an asshole

I see a tangle of emotions

I see kindness and generosity

I see patience and calmness

I see someone whom I shouldnt love

I see leadership and potential

I see love and hatred

I see us embracing

I see us together

I see us fighting and arguing

I see us making up after a fight

I see someone whom I love a lot

Does it matter what I see in you? Most of what I see tend to contradict each other....

No, it doesnt matter...You have turned me from a cold hearted beast into a woman with a heart.

Everything which you taught me, I shall remember....

Every single word you've said will remain in my mind.

....No, it honestly doesnt matter if you dont love me because I love you no matter what you do or say to me for my heart will go on loving you every single day.